Wholly Cripe!

Wait until you see the cool swag I got for attending a sex blogger session!

I would show you all me using it, but I would be blushing wildly!

-- Added Note --

Goofy me failed to note that the fabulous goody bag came to me courtesy of AAG who I actually met! Ok, mostly I sputtered like an idiot, but you get the idea....

But definitely a huge THANKS! to AAG!

So I missed HNT

But I made it to BlogHer!

I am here right now enjoying my first session on Digital Exhibitionists...
Which I think sums me up for these purposes...

We are discussing the questions of honesty

And that makes me wonder. Since I know that I am not being totally honest with you my readers... in part because I am protecting what I have in my life. Facing the ultimates truths in my life might make have to make changes.

I learned a couple of things:

a. There are more one legged cats out there

b. Art is in the selecting of what we say v. the whole truth

c. We have a responsibility to ourselves to keep ourselves safe and whole

How naked do we need to be?

Do people want to know more?

To know more of my secrets?

d. Our stories are important as a way document our lives and our era.

Yummy!

This has been an obsession this week.




Sex on the beach.







Ever since I saw this symbol appear on Asha's Facebook page... Yes that is a virtual cocktail sent to my preteen. Oddly enough I had never had one before. And today, I received my opportunity.. at lunch of all places. While eating I played the trivia game that they have in the restaurant... it is called Buzz Time. (ironic, I know)

In between rounds the screen stated that the house would award you a free drink if you could beat their "Champion's" high score.

Which I promptly did.

Naturally, I had to order the elusive sex on the beach.

It was delicious. But I don't know if it was the drink or the sweet taste of victory.

HNT-68

I don't know why I have chosen this image this week....

It certainly doesn't emphasize my less than stellar housekeeping skills... But this is how I feel about my life lately.

I make an effort. In this case, Mickey Mouse pancakes... which I did free hand... not from some mold (I know... not exactly a trick... stilll) and this is how it is received.

I have been told that I am like a butterfly... just waiting to emerge... I think I need to stay in my chrysalis a bit longer on days like this...

Sun burn, my ass!

Or why I should be allowed to sunbathe in the nude.

Like I am hurting anyone? Please.

But there I was up on my private porch taking a nap. Naked.

Oh ok the loser neighbors did come outside. But they can't see me. I am on the wrong side of the dinette roof. The only way anyone else can see me is if their vision is incredible. They are looking up and squinting to see the slats on the porch.

I am being careful. Staying low to the floor. Not attracting a lot of attention.. Not making any noise.

But out he comes. The Porn King. To inform me that I am getting sunburned. That my face is red. Ironically, my face is the part of my body that I cover! So I don't get it too sunburned. It is exposed to the sun more than the rest of my body.

I know when he is just embarrassed of me. and I am getting sick of it.

HNT-67

Oops.. I missed last week... Something about the inlaws hanging over my shoulder at every opportunity...

This is our current obsession this week, and for the next entire week really.

No, not the criminally insane...

Those of you in the know will recognize this institution as the place that Harry Potter's relatives, The Dursley's tell the neighbors that Harry is sent to during the school year.

Of course, I wouldn't mind finding some criminally bad boys... if you know what I mean!

Electricity

Running down my fingers

and out my toes

which when touched, made my body twitch uncontrollably

even into the night.


The rain and storms have passed

but my body is still tingling

shivering from the undischarged energy

Could I handle more?


I look forward to finding out

The Fate of Women

Is it our fate to be judged, not on our accomplishments?

Our thoughts, our deeds

Who we care for

How we show our love

The Power we wield


or


denigrated for what we lack

our errors, our faults, our flaws.


Of course, if you are reading this, you are scoffing and saying,

"No, we don't do that!"

"We are so much more advanced than that"


But you are wrong.

and here is the proof:

Mummy Reveals Egyptian Queen Was Fat, Balding and Bearded By Meredith F. Small

Hatshepsut was fat and bald,from the Times of India

Yup.

Here we are, nearly 3,500 years after her death and what are we discussing? Her buildings? policies? Why she systematically removed from the annals of history? No.

She was fat and bald.

Not a great queen who ruled in her own right in a time when women were seen and not heard.

But a joke.

because fat is funny.

What hope is there for the rest of us when we are judged this way?

Alone

Nude - 4
Diana Ong








With my family

I am alone.

I exist only as an image, an ideal

The real me

a disappointment

to be scoffed at and belittled.


Where are you?

When bad things happen to good phallus

I was saddened to read this article today, but more surprised to hear that the cause was not associated with global warming. But was glad to hear that the lingam for Parvati and Ganesha are intact.

Hindu Shrine's Icy Stalagmite Melts

- - - - - - - - - - - -

By AIJAZ HUSSAIN Associated Press Writer

July 02,2007 | SRINAGAR, India -- A naturally formed stalagmite in a Kashmiri mountain shrine has melted away, officials said Monday, blaming body heat from the hundreds of thousands of Hindu pilgrims who visit each year.

For over 200 years, Hindus have worshipped the stalagmite, called a lingam, as an incarnation of the Lord Shiva, the Hindu god of destruction and regeneration. Its size has fluctuated in previous years -- ranging from 5 to 12 feet tall -- but the it has never before disappeared entirely.

"One of the main reasons for its melting is the conduction of body heat of the huge crowds at the formation," said Shakeel Ahmed, who heads Geology and Geophysics Department at the University of Kashmir.

He also blamed the helicopters that deposit pilgrims near the mountain cave and generators powering light bulbs.

"There will be some disappointment for the pilgrims as the main lingam has completely melted," said Arun Kumar, a top official of the Amarnath Shrine Board, which manages the pilgrimage.

Officials say at least 400,000 devotees are expected to make the 10-mile trek from the nearest village to the Amarnath shrine, in a mountain cave 13,500 feet above sea level that is topped with a glacier. Pilgrims leave offerings of flowers, coins and paper money inside the cave.

Chanting hymns and ringing bells, the first group of nearly 12,000 pilgrims on Sunday began the journey amid tight security against Islamic militants. However on Monday, government has again suspended the pilgrimage because of heavy rains en route the cave shrine.

Muslim rebels who have been fighting for decades with India over Kashmir accuse Hindu-majority India of using the pilgrimage as a political statement to bolster its claim over the Himalayan region.

Fuck

yeah.

That is what I said.

I am fucking sick and tired of being understanding and kind when the people that I deal with on an everyday basis suck. What they suck I will leave to your's and their imagination.

Can someone make me feel better about the sink hold of reality that I find myself in?

Please?

I promise to make it worthwhile for you....

Or as much as a fat whore like myself can manage.

Testing the Lounge Chair...

On a lovely summer Sunday afternoon...

The sun was lovely on my pale flesh as was the breeze blowing over my nipples...

Now if I could just stop worrying about being caught naked on my porch, I could enjoy it more.

HNT-66

When most people look straight down they see their feet (I think).

This is my view.

Summer Idyll

The most perfect way to spend a summer day is naked.

Naked in bed, in the arms of your lover, enjoying the rising heat and soft breezes lull you to your own world. Nothing exists there but soft whispers, impassioned cries and the promise of peace.

I wish I could live like that everyday.

Don't you?

hnt-65

This is what I can show you of the great cicada invasion of 2007.

This is my one and only cicada.

Oh, he is ugly.

and big

and on my freaking back door (did I mention that I hate bugs?)

Summer breeze

]]
This image makes me think of a breezy summer day, lying naked on a soft blanket and making love all afternoon long...


What does it say to you?

HNT-64

Well, we are finally settling into a kind of domesticity here now that the big move is over...

Today I was off to the farmers market today... Can you tell what was in season?

I wasn't anticipating this conversation

The one when I have to ask my 12 year old daughter why there is a balled up condom in the living room.

Yeah... I was thinking that was a conversation for another day, another month... really another year.

But there I was having the conversation. Wow, that was a fun one too.

Me: Asha, can you explain why I found this condom on the living room floor?

Asha: Lizzie was forgot to through it out.

Me: Yes, but why was the condom there in the first place?

Asha: It was a joke.

Me: A joke on who?

Asha: A joke on Drina... We thought it would be funny to give it to her for a birthday present.

Me: Did it ever occur to you that this might be a bad idea?

Asha: Not really...Plus, it was Lizzie's idea.

Me: It never occurred to you to say, "Whoa, Lizzie... My mom sees that and she is going to shit a brick"

PK: Well we are glad that you aren't afraid to buy condoms... remember it is better to use one than not use one.

The next day, I was driving around Asha and her friend Frieda, who had also been at the house when the condom was being played with. I asked Frieda if her mother knew about the condom play. "No and it would be best if she didn't" was the reply I got.

Fair enough. But I told the girls, if the ever wanted to do anything with a condom other than use it as a balloon, I wanted them to promise me that they would talk to a grown up... presumably one that they could trust. And promise they did.

So that is where I am. Afraid that at some point in the near future that the condom will no longer be a joke but an actual need for my daughter. Hopefully, I have maintained the lines of communication well enough that when that time comes she will come to me for advice.

For now, I wait and worry

HNT-63

I mentioned that we experienced a death in the family, when really we experienced two...


That first picture was taken a couple of weeks ago as part of HNT.. Barney was fine...old, cranky but basically healthy.


The next one, we took the morning we put him down. You could see his shoulder blades and he couldn't walk... He went downhill so fast that it scares us a bit. The vet said that at the age of 18, there really wasn't anything that could be done. So we held our kitten as the vet pushed the drugs into his veins and we said our goodbyes.

It has been quite a ride the last couple of weeks.. I hope things even out soon. (although I am guessing that having my own bathroom and a cleaning lady will help!)

Hmm, more than I thought.

Yes, I have been absent for a while now.. moving was a pain. Follow that with a death in the family and the end of the school year, well I think you can guess how that has interferred.

In the meantime, I saw this over at http://isabellasnow.blogspot.com/s blog and thought I would try it out...

Turns out that I rated higher than I thought that I would...