Lost Again

The stress level here may have dropped but it is not gone.

Yes, I managed to get construction loan fixed so that the contractors could be paid...

I then got to spend the next day making sure that the constractors WERE paid.

Then, just for fun, I got to go to school to help carve pumpkins, then attended parent teacher conferences, ran kids to parties and sleep overs all over the northern part of Chicago and dealt with stressed and over-served husband who at the 11th hour decided that he needed my help... He ddoesn't want me. Just my feet to help him get off. Not an act of love. Not even an act of mutual lust.

I am alone.

There is no one to touch me. No one to offer me comfort and love. No one desiring me for my unique gifts.

What am I to say? I need a life outside my family because they bring me no joy? I need a lover to rediscover the woman I used to be?